My life – version 3.5

I have revised my life plans so many times that it would’ve been too much of a cliche to use Life 2.0 as title for this blog post as I originally intended. I should’ve gone out to meet my friends on this sunny Sunday afternoon, but I am in flu and this feverish delirium seems to be good fuel for inspiring thoughts, thus I spent some hours brainstorming my life plan and goals. I do it regularly as I can see from my previous notes, dated 2012. It was about time to collect my scattered thoughts.

Today I didn’t achieve much, but decided to use the blog as it was intended to be used in the first place – to become more open and public with my ideas. Admittedly, perfectionism has been holding me back. I have numerous posts in draft status but just can not get them up to the standard I have been holding. So time to lower the standards and put out something and later (maybe) collect and compose those random posts into more well thought of “how to” kind of posts that I have been writing until now.

I have come a long way since those times but my goal is still the same, to become a better person.

From a tiny person to my best self

Back in 2010 I was insecure, I felt lost, I lacked purpose, I felt that I didn’t “belong” in this world and I was unhappy in my relationship. I started my blog in February 2010 as I wanted to develop my character by opening myself to more people. I had just met two people who understood me and accepted me as who I was. They showed me the path of self-development they were walking and that further inspired me to open myself to the world and start taking control of my life.

And I did try very hard to change my life for the better. After lot of self reflection and brainstorming and good times I left Lithuania and moved back to Norway. I managed to build a social network for the second time in my life (Lithuania was first). I managed to improve my professional skills while remaining interesting, authentic person. I travelled around the world in order to expose myself to the world so it could change me. And it did change me. I met awesome people, I had let go of the peak of my desire to be in control of things. Things that are and will always be utterly out of my control. I learned to relax a bit. And life became immediately much better. I had learned many of my weaknesses as well. And I had a strong will to fix them.

  • My best self knows what he wants in life and this brings peace of mind.

  • My best self has the skills to go for what he wants and this brings confidence.

  • My best self appreciates the people, experiences and adventures in life and this brings happiness and good stories.

  • My best self recognises and accepts his strengths and weaknesses, this brings integrity and passion.

  • My best self knows that whatever happens, good or bad, something can be learned from it.

I am not my best self yet.

How to become my best self?

It is possible to drive from New York to Los Angeles in the night seeing just fifty meters ahead. You know the road exists, although you don’t see it when you start the journey. Sometimes you get lost and drive the wrong way for a while until you see the next sign pointing you back to the general direction of Los Angeles. The road of self-improvement is similar. You see only the road immediately ahead of you. But you know you can rely on your sense of direction and navigation skills.

In my post series about existential carnaval from 2011, I described the three cups of life; love, social life and work. Today my house of self-improvement model contains four cornerstones; work, health, relationships and spirituality. They are self-explanatory and all require attention in order to retain what already exists and to accumulate more “strength” or “character” in it. Spirituality embeds creativity, languages, intellectual stimulation that is not directly applicable in work, health or relationship.

In order to strengthen a skill, say health and fitness, which is my latest obsession, you need to spend a lot of time skimming through the information overflow called internet. Then you need to see the big picture or the forest from the trees and not get stuck with buzz words and snake oil salesmen. Then you need to identify and separate the sustainable long-term solutions from the quick&dirty fixes. Usually there are lot of tools of the trade and each has their individual problems, issues and strengths. This work is not easy but keep in mind that in order to become a better than your master, you need to take lessons from other masters and do some cherry picking and combine them into your own style or philosophy. It worked for Bruce Lee, it will work for you too. If you want to rise above the bro-science and be the most informed, that is.

  • Skim through the information overflow

  • See the big picture

  • Identify sustainable long-term solutions

  • Gather information from different sources and masters

  • Cherry pick all information and combine them into your own philosophy or method

  • Apply in daily life

Whoever coined the term gamification, is spot on. Gamify everything in real life and suddenly things make sense and making progress is easier. Do you want to make your own game or adopt someone else’s?

These people inspire me (in the order I found them):

Steve Pavlina, personal development guru
Leo Babauta, minimalist
Tim Ferriss, personal development guru
Ted Simon, traveler
Oliver Emberton, a blogger
Bruce Lee, philosopher and athlete
Richard Branson, self-made money

posted: 14 April 27
under: Lifestyle