My plans for world domination (were sadly mistaken)

“World domination. The same old dream. Our asylums are full of people who think they’re Napoleon. Or God.”

Photo by: DerrickT

My plans were just a tiny bit less megalomaniac.

My plan was originally to fill my passport with stamps and visas before its expiration in 2013. That was in 2003, when I applied for my first ever passport before going abroad for a combined business&pleasure trip at the mature age of twenty-five. For us Finns, Sweden does not count as “abroad”, so I spent my first quarter of a century steadily in my home country, unlike most westerners of similar age. Anyway, today is only three years left before my passport expires and there are still 26 empty pages out of 42. Let’s admit it. It ain’t going to happen. I am not going to fill it with stamps and visas. But I am a little bit proud of the few “exotic” stamps and visas I’ve got in it. They have not come without personal and financial sacrifices, sweat, tears and lots of determination.

Today, the plans are in a need of some adjustment.

I could say I want to visit all 192 United Nations members. I could also say I want to visit every continent (four, five, six or seven depending on how you want to count). Or I could say that I want to visit every city with pigeon population over one gazillion.


I could be brutally honest to myself and say that I want to visit every place on earth that I find interest in at a given time. Even if it’d be an all-inclusive package tour to Canary Islands. I think this is the only way to genuinely enjoy life on the road instead of bragging about “socially accepted travel experiences” such as these overheard examples:

“The quality of pottumuussi in one of the many Finnish speaking restaurants in Thailand was worse than last year. And the hotel we always stay in had one new staff member who had little bit of accent in her Finnish. Can you imagine that, absolutely no respect towards the paying customer?”

“I was fighting dozen cobras with my left hand and eating monkey brain from a still warm monkey with my right hand while trying to make a Facebook status update with my toes, but I couldn’t connect. Maybe I should’ve come down to North Base Camp for better signal?”

Oh no, oh no, not me, I am doing it my way. I don’t want to be like home when abroad, nor do I want to seek the “respect” of hard-core backpackers, real or virtual.

This summer, I am going to Siberia.

Photo by: volante




Because I can. Because I’ve never been there. Because I want to tick two countries from my to-do list. Because I want to see new places, meet new people, have adventures and good time, yet be relatively comfortable and not pushing myself too far out from my comfort zone. That’s why I am bringing both Lonely Planet Phrasebook and a friend with me. The former is for connecting, the latter is for comfort.

My gut feeling says that this is going to be the best trip so far in my life. I have sometimes been wrong, but my gut feeling – never!

Finnish speakers can follow the developments of the trip online on my friends blog. English speakers, sorry, no can do. (shrug)

Disclaimer: Subjects in the photos are for illustrative purposes only. Names, quotes and the world domination plans have been slightly altered to protect the world.

posted: 10 July 2
under: Lifestyle